What a trite statement! But oh so true!
I've been living the rural life for 13 months now; deep in the Bible Belt of Manitoba. Assimilation has not yet begun, as I was somewhat afraid of. The more relaxed pace of life appeals to me. Nursing in a 21 bed rural hospital appeals to me. Childcare here is above any childcare I've ever been privy to in the city. Family is nearby and the convenience of impromptu visits is a privilege. There are many reasons I'm enjoying living here. Switching from one rural facility to another seems to have made a huge difference in my outlook.
But, my 23 year old son lives in the city, and it has not escaped my attention that I moved away from him a year ago. A long complicated tale involving my 19 year old daughter should be inserted here, but it's too long. Regardless, she is returning to live in the city as soon as she possibly can. That means two of my three children will be residing there, while I am residing here.
My two older children have a father living in another city in another province who has essentially forgotten their existence. It breaks my heart to see that he does not call on birthdays or send cards or gifts.
I'm afraid that if I live far away from them (only an hour!) they'll feel that I'm abandoning them as well. I could never do that!
Adult children do not need physical care from parents, and mine do not seem to want a lot of emotional care. Regardless, I feel I need to be near them, in the same city. In the same province is not good enough for me!
My grown children have passed the formative years; beyond the years where I could influence the outcome of their lives. Decisions made now are made as independent adults, no longer requiring mom's blessing or permission.
Kevy, my 3 year old, requires plenty of physical care and his formative years are ongoing. My #1 priority in life at this point is to provide him with a stable home environment, complete with lots of love and all the other characteristics that make a good home. Part of that plan includes plenty of outside play and very minimal electronic entertainment. In my mind country living is more conducive to that type of life than city life is.
And there is my dilemma. I want to do the right thing by my children, all of them, and the right thing for myself.
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