Some of my FB statuses are long enough to be short stories, but this is a story that would push the boundaries of status length. Besides, there is only so much patience I have for keying in lengthy dialogues on my iPhone.
Having said that, let me tell you a story.
It happened one bitterly cold Sunday in January. Kevin and I picked up my mother at her home and proceeded to drive off to Winnipeg. What was supposed to be a surprise for Great-Gramma turned out to not be much of a surprise because Luanna, my dear dear sister-in-law, was unaware that the event was to be a surprise. The surprise was that we were going to pick up Jen, my daughter, Kevy's birth mother, and my mother's granddaughter who she had not seen in many months. I'm sure she was convinced that Jen no longer existed and was just a part of her memory bank.
Now before I go any further with this tale, let me fill in some background, for those of you who are blissfully unaware of my mother's status (and I do not mean FB status). She is 87 years old, has pitifully poor hearing despite two expensive hearing aids, and has some form of dementia which is advancing surprisingly rapidly the past few weeks. She is normally very pleasant, but has had some more unpleasant moments recently, which is why we started her on Risperidone ten days ago, with very good effect.
Now that you are up to speed..... we are on the way to Winnipeg, the drive there was uneventful. After no confusion whatsoever (on my part) we found Jenny's new home and proceeded to pick her up. Her and I had prearranged to go to Smitty's at Pembina and Grant, and there we went.
After we were seated in our booth, the fun began. And what fun it was. Mom has her condition which leaves her at a distinct disadvantage at the best of times. Kevin is a toddler, which should also be known as a medical condition. Jennifer is 21 with an attitude. This is definitely a medical condition. I'm 44 and I was the only normal one at the table. And if you're buying that, well, you've got bigger things to be worrying about.
Picture the four of us at a table. Mom can't hear anything we're saying unless we practically shout. Kevin talks and fidgets non stop. Jennifer says very little and what she says usually should not be repeated. I spent most of my time repeating things that had to be censored first. Then attempting to discipline an unruly toddler on the other side of the table whose birth mother seems to think she can make decisions on behalf of.
Jen thought it was a good idea to play tic-tac-toe with Gramma. She won't be doing that again anytime soon. Mom beat her with 3 or 4 x's. In short, she got schooled and good!!
The drive home was ridiculously funny. Driving down the Trans Canada highway, a route that my mother has been on and driven on at least a million times, she asked where we were. It seems she no longer recognized the landmarks that were once so familiar. No, that's not the funny part. What was funny was that at the very same time, Kevy asked what road we were on and what the sign beside the road said. This cacophony of noise and conversation was brief but intense. Everytime I spoke to Kevin, Mom thought I was talking to her and demanded that I repeat myself. Kevin had this knack of simply not speaking until Mom was already talking and then I was listening to two at once.
(written last winter; not sure why I never posted it then)
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