Regroup and Recharge

Hmmmm, I know I've got something in my head just waiting for a chance to get out, but I can't quite figure out what it is. So I'll just start typing and hope my thoughts organize themselves.

Maybe I'll start by telling you about our day (and by 'our' I mean myself and Kev). It started out a tad on the early side, 0715. But, when Kev's awake, it's time to get up and take on the day. Yes, that is a saying of Dr. Laura Schlessinger. "Take on the day."

Coffee, toast, laundry, dishes, and some phone calls and it was almost time for our naps. Turns out Kev got a nice long nap while I scurried around getting ready to go to a birthday party. Pack my bag, pack Kev's bag, wash my hair, fix my face (ha!), find clothes for me that still fit, bring everything outside to wait for our ride, and then wake Kev from his nap. Our day has pretty much followed that theme all day; busy, busy, busy. It's been a good day; we saw lots of family and friends and took lots of good pictures, but it was busy.

Now I remember what's on my mind. I think I mentioned this during the day to someone and I think other people often feel the same way, but I just don't hear a lot of talk about it.

After working 2 12-hour days, not only am I tired, but I'm completely "peopled out." That is, I've had enough interaction with other humans that I'd just prefer to spend time alone (but with Kev) and have no demands placed on me other than keeping my house clean and having a long nap. One day like that and I am completely refueled and ready to face a few more busy days.

By no means am I anti-social, I just love being at home, puttering around the house and recharging myself for the next flurry of activity. As much as I love my job, I've definitely noticed that interacting with co-workers and patients on an intimate level for 12 hours is utterly exhausting. By intimate, I am referring to the relationship between nurse and patient; we are privileged enough to be allowed a glimpse of their most vulnerable moments and peer into their lives, if only for an hour or two. We pry details from patients that they would divulge in no other relationship. It is necessary to know things about our patients that they may not have been expecting us to ask, ie. my favorite question is "when was your last poop?" The answers to this question can be quite surprising at times!

Working with two to three other nurses and one or two doctors plus a myriad of support staff in such close quarters necessitates that you have at least a basic understanding of social norms. Needless to say, this is an issue for me at the best of times! My mouth frequently engages before my brain has had time to process what the mouth is planning to say. This is not always a good thing. I find it necessary to actively and consciously guard what I say, and to be on alert for a 12 straight hours is mentally exhausting. In particular, I find that I have drastically cut down on my use of 4-letter words in my new position at Bethesda and have not made off-color jokes or comments while at work. I'm still trying to decided if this is a good thing or a bad thing.

What I'm trying to get at is that nursing is not only physically demanding, it is mentally exhausting. When I'm done my shifts, I need the downtime of days off to regroup and recharge for the next shifts.

And, just for the record, despite the exhaustion that follows a few consecutive shifts, I wouldn't change my career for anything! The satisfaction of knowing I'm doing what I am certain I was destined to do, and loving what I do, is worth the exhaustion.