Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Baby Girl Leaves the Nest

It is 0509 as I write this post, I’ve been awake since 0430, and out of bed since 0500. Why so early? This is the morning my baby girl is leaving the nest to begin a new phase in her life. She is moving into a two bedroom apartment with wood-stained kitchen cupboards located on the military base in Valcartier, Quebec, which is where her boyfriend has recently received his first posting.

My mother often asks me how I feel about her moving and if I have ‘peace’ about it; I always reply in the affirmative. In my mind it makes no difference if she’s moving to an apartment across Winnipeg or across the country. She’s moving forward with her life, and doing the things that young adults do. To live in another province, especially Quebec, is an opportunity that does not happen every day. She has always enjoyed experiencing and learning new things. This move presents many opportunities for both, and I’m happy she gets to experience this.

She will obviously need to brush up on the French that she learned in school and be able to speak fluently enough to get a job. This is a challenge she is looking forward to with great anticipation.

My mother sees it as a personal affront every time a grandchild moves away from here. She loves each and every one of her descendants dearly and wishes they would all stay nearby so she could see them more frequently. Dad loved his grandchildren just as much, but had a different attitude towards relatives moving away. This just gave him another excuse to jump in the car and go on an impromptu road trip; in this regard I must have inherited my father’s mindset.

There is a possibility that Kev and I will fly there for her 20th birthday in October; that would require saving enough money for airfare for two by that time as Kev turns two in March and will require full fare. If you’ve read the posts regarding my finances, you’ll know the situation in that area of my life is not optimal, but I will make every attempt to funnel that much out of my income.

My dear, dear niece, Tanya, and her husband, Dorwin, live approximately an hour away from Valcartier. I’m hoping that Jen will be able to visit them at some point, it would be good for both Tanya and Jen. As well, with Tanya nearby, I will be able to see her if/when I go visit Jen in October. Its been much too long since I’ve seen her.

Several people have asked about Kev, inquiring if he was going with her. (For those who don’t already know the situation, Jen gave birth to Kev on March 30, 2008, attempted parenting, suffered post-partum depression, and on August 1, 2008, she signed guardianship of Kev over to me. The offer to be Kev’s primary caregiver had been ‘on the table’ since the beginning of the pregnancy.) He is staying with me. In my opinion, there is no other logical option, as I have been his parent for most of his precious twenty-one months.

In summary, I’m okay with Jen flying across the country to start a new chapter in her life. And, Kev is staying with me, his “Bumma.” (Occasionally he calls me “Mum” and I don’t discourage this.)

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